Crypto Banter
  • ABOUT
  • CRYPTO SCHOOL
  • LIVE STREAMS
Gari Panda NFT collection

I may have come into a vast sum of money… and I’m screwed.

We received a letter from an anonymous hacker. They're asking the community for help!

Crypto Banter by Crypto Banter
April 1, 2022
in Breaking News
Share on TwitterWhatsappShare on Facebook

Money doesn’t buy you happiness. 

I can now confirm this. Why? Because in the past 24 hours I have become insanely rich. In the truest sense.

 I am now rich beyond my wildest dreams… and going insane. 

Here’s what happened:

TL;DR:

  • Great idea
  • Great execution 
  • Poor forward planning

I’m something of a genius, a technical whizz. 

As a baby, I’d disassemble all my toys, figure out how they work, and put them back together. 

I also have a fiercely competitive streak. Always did. As a child, I spent 10,000 hours becoming a world-class diablo performer because a teacher said I’d never amount to anything. 

Anyway, when I heard about the Poly hack last year, $600m worth of liberated funds, I knew I wouldn’t be satisfied until I’d pulled off something even bigger. 

My dream soon became an obsession. 

And my determination to pull off the greatest exploit in DeFi history has led me here. To a Bubble Tea bar in an undisclosed city, where I’m writing this letter to the kind folks at Crypto Banter. For the record, I have no association with them at all.

Anyway, ever since Vitalik Buterin’s post about the multichain future, and how cross-chain bridges were too vulnerable to attack to provide a long-term solution, I searched tirelessly for a target. 

And then I found it. On Ronin. The blockchain behind Axie Infinity. 

Vitalik, happy to prove you right – you’re a legend! The future really is multichain!

Anyway, the Ronin bridge is how Axie Infinity nerds move their ETH to Ronin. Technically speaking, it’s how they transform their ETH into Wrapped ETH for use on the Ronin chain, where they can buy pets called Axies and whatnot. The bridge also allows them to transfer their Ronin-based tokens back to Ethereum for withdrawal. 

How did I pull it off?

I mentioned I was a genius, which is how I came up with the following plan:

Funds suspended in the Ronin Bridge are secured by 9 unique keys. Turns out you don’t need all 9 to access the kitty. 5 will do. 

Morons. Thanks to my handiwork, this has been changed to 8 out of 9. 

https://roninblockchain.substack.com/p/community-alert-ronin-validators?s=w

You’re welcome. 

So last week, I found a sneaky way in; backdoor access to the bridge node, where I was able to get my hands on 4 of the validators, plus a third-party validator run by the DAO.

And, voila. Unfettered access to Aladdin’s cave. 

You can’t imagine the rush, the adrenaline, of transferring 176,000 ETH and 25 million USDC. It’s a hell of a buzz! 

https://etherscan.io/address/0x098b716b8aaf21512996dc57eb0615e2383e2f96

Now here’s the number one problem with blockchain technology. It’s too transparent. Everyone can see everything that has ever happened.

For example, my next ploy: moving the funds! 

Imagine stealing 600 million 6 days ago and depositing money on @FTX_Officialhttps://t.co/nYWYC1jJ1J pic.twitter.com/YGzr7uyk5Q

— Igor Igamberdiev (@FrankResearcher) March 29, 2022

Admittedly, not the best idea. I actually spent hours depositing ETH, panicking, withdrawing it, depositing again, and so on and so forth.  

But here was my thinking: I needed to get it out of my wallet because everyone knew the address. 

And here’s the kicker: I’m stuck. Everyone is watching me like a hawk. If I move the money, it’s all over Twitter. I’m technically half a billionaire on paper, but I can’t spend anything. 

To add insult to injury, people are laughing at me. Why? Because I got liquidated after shorting RON and AXS, with 50x leverage. 

I simply assumed the price would fall after my genius exploit was discovered. 

there had to have been someone who noticed the 600M exploit on chain, 50x lev shorted axie and ronin, then got liquidated because.. no one else realized for six days pic.twitter.com/D3QiyYjb7u

— foks🌸 (@ExaltedFoks) March 29, 2022

Problem is, nobody noticed. 

People are so dumb. 

This tweet pretty much sums up where I’m at right now.

Ronin exploit takes:
– Smartest guy in the room lost money. Shorted on-chain info & price climbed 20%. No one watched the chain.
– Trustless bridges are light clients as smart contracts or checkpointing enough data. Nothing else.
– Good luck laundering $600m in ETH.

— mhonkasalo.lens (@mhonkasalo) March 29, 2022

On that last point, I’m open to suggestions. 

This guy seems to think I’m some kind of Robin Hood figure. 

The hacker should really use the 173k ETH to perform anarchistic central bank-style open market operations.

Some ideas:

1. Stress test DeFi projects
2. Activist governance
3. Try to depeg Tether and UST
4. Sweep the Milady floor up to 100 ETH (optional)

— Jack Niewold 🫡 (@JackNiewold) March 29, 2022

Someone else suggested the following, but I’m just not into NFTs. 

hypothetically speaking, if i hacked $600M of ETH, i would use it to pump the shit out of all the NFTs for weeks and hope that in the confusion and frenzy, i am able to wash out maybe ~10% from several "NFT trading" alt addresses that self-deal

hypothetically speaking, of course

— 찌 G 跻 じ 𝙎𝙚𝙣𝙥𝙖𝙞 of the 𝙃𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙖𝙞 (@DegenSpartan) March 29, 2022

Anyway, I’m stuck. 

Which is why I thought I’d post this letter to see if anyone has any smart ideas on how to help me? 

I’m even willing to offer a reward (up to 10ETH!) for anyone who’s able to provide me with a solution. 

Please, leave your best ideas below! 

Tags: ALTCOINSGAMING & NFTsMARKETS
Crypto Banter

Crypto Banter

World's fastest growing Crypto YouTube channel and consistently bringing you credible crypto wisdom.

  • Home
  • Live Stream
  • Community
  • Crypto School
  • Banter Capital
  • Crypto Banter
  • Our Ethics
  • Work with Us
  • Terms of Service
  • Privacy Policy
© 2022 Crypto Banter.
All Rights Reserved.
Sniper Trading School
Crypto School

© 2022 Crypto Banter. All Rights Reserved.

  • Home
  • Live Stream
  • Community
  • Crypto School
  • Banter Capital
  • Crypto Banter
  • Our Ethics
  • Work with Us
  • Terms Services
  • Privacy Policy

© 2022 Crypto Banter. All Rights Reserved.